Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Christmas Day

Our first year together Chuck bought me Doris Day movies. It was a little unusual so I got him back.

One of my childhood best friends cross stitched me this after Lucy died. I love it and for Christmas my mom framed it for me. I was my favorite gift. Thank you Rachel.

Technically this is Boxing Day. We got home from Mexico late on Christmas Day so we pushed back Christmas a Day. It was a nice way to do it. Carlie's kids came over to Gammy and Grandpa's (which is our house to now.)

A couple hours later we were at the doctor's for Hazel's leg.


A little bit of the food we gave out.
They waited outside for hours while we got things ready.

We were lucky enough to get to go to Mexico over Christmas. It was a good distraction and made celebrating Christmas without Lucy a little easier. One day we went whale watching which was amazing. I've been before but this time we saw them jump out of the water. We saw mana rays 16 feet across and got so close to dolphins we could hear there little squeeks. I loved it. Chuck gets sea sick so he stayed back with our kids. I stayed with the kids one day when he did zip lines in the jungle. And my mom stayed with the kids one day so Chuck and I could go do some service. My family went to Mexico last year and found an organization they really liked called 'Families of the Dump." This community lives just outside a dump and they earn money by finding things in the trash they can recycle. This organization is doing some really good things for this community. The day we were there they had received a large donation of food from the man who owns the resort we were staying at. We helped unload 2 trucks of food and passed it out to the community. It felt good getting sweaty and doing some hard work. The Mexican men were making fun of Carlie and I for lifting the heavy crates. Yea, we workout. Sometimes :)

Christmas Eve

I refused to take a family picture with all four of us. It feels too soon.

Our last night in Mexico was Christmas Eve. We went to the resort's fiesta. We were right next to the dance floor which was fun for the kids, especially Hazel. Another little girl Hazel's age came over and started dancing. Hazel was fascinated with her. It's like she remembers she's supposed to have a little friend there but for some reason she doesn't anymore. It breaks my heart. I nearly cried when the little girl's father started asking me how old she was.

In the hotel

Happy to say Hazel did not get sun burned in Mexico. But putting on sun screen was never fun.

Room with a view

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Setting the turtles free

One night in Mexico we were able to set baby sea turtles into the ocean. I loved it. Jack didn't quite get it but I loved that he kept calling his turtle squirt.

My Mom and Dad
Jack and Chuck
Momma, me, my sissy Carlie and Hazel
Jack and squirt
Go squirt!

Having all the people around gives the sea turtles a better chance of survival. The birds leave them alone.

Halle and Jessi

Hazel face
My little bro Michael and girlfriend Stacy

I miss how cute Jack's hair was in Mexico. It curled so easily.

Saturday, January 7, 2012

We took Hazel to the doctor on Tuesday and discovered her swollen lymph node had doubled in size from the previous week. They ended up admitting her to the hospital that day. She was quite the grumpy girl. Stranger danger is in full force. Getting the IV in took over an hour of trying and brought back some difficult memories. We were told she would not need a biopsy if they found pus because would indicate an infection. So we were thrilled to find out it was an infection. They drained the site and filled it with gauze. Every morning for a week we have to hold her down and pull a little out. She hates it but overall she's feeling a lot better. Hazel did so well we were able to leave the hospital that first night. I was relieved because I was not looking forward to Hazel freaking out all night. I'm so grateful this is over and turned out to be nothing serious. We appreciate all the prayers.

Monday, January 2, 2012


Last year at about this time I was feeling very discouraged about the upcoming year. I just wished it could be over. Well here we are. It's over. I'm so glad I didn't know then what I know now. We didn't know Lucy was going to die. We thought we were through the worst by June. Little did we know it was just beginning. A lot of people have expressed their relief that 2011 is over and are hopeful 2012 will be better. Even though this was the hardest years of mine and Chuck's life, we feel we'd be betraying Lucy to say it was the worst. We heard our girl's first words. We saw Jack learn to read. We celebrated Easter, our daughters' first birthday and the removal of one helmet. Our girls became friends and Jack adored his sisters. Most of Lucy's life was spent at home, the place she loved best. Lucy wasn't going to die. We were already making plans of where would be the best places to live for Lucy's future medical care. I think a lot of people think that maybe this was easier because she was sick. We had as much hope for her as Jack or Hazel. I miss her so much. Someone told my husband this week that I need to, "get over it." I know they weren't meaning to be unkind, but I don't think I will ever "get over it." I don't think we are meant to get over those we love. I feel her pulling our family towards her. I don't want to forget everything she taught me.

I loved Easter this year and so did Lucy.

Jack being Chuck's son has no idea was this gear is even used for.

Happy girl.

Chuck did a 5k by the Kansas City temple.

I was so proud Lucy was able to learn to crawl. It took so much work for her.

One of Lucy's last days at home.

I love this picture of my niece with the girls.


This picture of Hazel looks just like a Lucy face to me.

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